Fighting Back Against False Allegations That You Have Communication Issues

Many people we work with are unable to separate their race-based perceptions from reality. As a result, when some people work with Blacks, they may be preconditioned to miscontrue things said or done by a Black worker based on their own racial prejudices and stereotyping. For instance, a person with racial biases may be interacting with a Black worker, who asks several questions about the procedures being used on a project.

The Black worker may be labeled as being difficult to work with, very negative, hostile or may be accused of not being a team player simply because this person has a preconceived notion that Blacks are argumentative and confrontational. Instead of taking the questions as legitimate business and task-related questions, the Black worker may be looked at as being insubordinate, rude or "talking back." This is how race-based prejudices and biases can feed into problems in the workplace.

In the workplace, many Blacks hear about these race-based prejudices and stereotypes with the accusation that they have "communication issues."

Allowing someone to falsely characterize you as being angry, defensive, hostile, pissed off, distant/aloof, unable to take constructive criticism, etc. is a major problem. You could end up constantly trying to erase the negative and false perceptions created about you by those who have labeled you as having a problem communicating with staff. Being labeled as having communication issues will affect your performance evaluations, salary increase, and can significantly decrease your chance to advance within the company. Anytime you are falsely accused of having communication issues, you have to give serious thought about how to respond.

Here are some things you can do:

TIP#1: When it comes to so-called communication issues, try not to let the conversation become about your personality. Let it be known, right up front, that if your personality is to be discussed and dissected, you would expect that the personality of everyone involved (in whatever issue was raised) be discussed and dissected—person by person.

Why? Because, once the conversation goes down the path of discussing a Black person’s personality, it will likely become an all consuming, one-sided affair where the Black person will be expected to accept and acknowledge any list of faults being offered up by White coworkers and managers. If everyone’s personality isn’t being discussed, your personality should not be discussed. Communication is a two-way street. No individual should be held accountable for a conversation taking a perverse turn for the worse.

TIP #2: Check your company’s personnel manual to see what the guidelines are for handling work-based issues and personality-based issues. For instance, I had a former employer that explicitly stated that supervisors should stay away from making personality-based assessments of employees. Find out if there is similar language in your company’s personnel guidelines. Make sure that so-called personality issues, particularly fraudulent personality issues, do not creep into your performance evaluations and are not held against you in some other way.

TIP #3: Be careful approaching a person regarding racial stereotyping and labeling. I can guarantee that conversation will likely go quickly downhill--no matter how delicately you address the issue. All the person will hear is that you are calling them a racist. Even if they are, you have to be careful with a conversation like this. But, that doesn't mean you shouldn't have the conversation. However, before having any sort of conversation about such a sensitive issue, address the problem with your supervisor first to give them a heads up that this is an issue you have to deal with. Trust me, the person you speak to is probably going to run straight to your supervisor anyway. If it's a White woman, she may go to your supervisor crying and blubbering. All of that emotion will take the focus off of what has been happening and you will be in a defensive position about something other than what you intended to discuss. Before you speak to someone about race-based stereotyping, have as many examples as you can about how they are falsely labeling you based on racial perceptions and how they are making race-influenced assessments about your behavior, your speech, the motivation behind your actions, etc. If your supervisor says that you shouldn't discuss the issue with the person, you should contact Human Resources to try to get the matter resolved.

TIP #4: Document how this person has twisted your words and/or intentionally or untentionally misread the motivation of your actions. Document this person, if you know they have similar problems with other minorities. Find out everything you can about these other issues. Try to get statements from people, which will support your allegations that this person may have a problem working with Blacks and other so-called minorities. You can then address any issues with your supervisor. Remember, it’s important to show patterns of negative behavior from this individual. You have to prove that this person’s actions are negatively impacting your ability to do your job and/or your career (e.g., diminishing your promotion potential during performance review time, etc.)

Tip #5: Consider asking coworkers to shoot you an email regarding the quality of your work and your overall job performance/behavior. This should include comments about their working relationship with you. It's always a great weapon to have written statements that contradict someone's false claims about you.

More on Race and Color Discrimination Prohibitions

This is the final post (for the week) on the topic of race and color discrimination. I’ve been providing these updates on and off for the past few weeks because race and color are obviously at the core of much of the discrimination that takes place in the workplace. Discrimination is not simply about being passed up for a promotion or not getting the salary increase that you’ve earned through your job performance. There are many areas, where employers may engage in discrimination.

For instance, an employer can engage in discrimination by denying an employee training because they are African American, while allowing White employees the opportunity to improve their knowledge and skills—setting up an unfair advantage in the workplace. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, and in line with this example, Federal courts have previously ruled that denying someone the building blocks for a promotion (such as training) is just as bad as denying the person the promotion itself.

Because of the numerous ways in which employers can discriminate against employees, I want everyone to be very clear about conduct that is prohibited in the workplace. I hope these posts have been helpful in confirming and clarifying illegal activity that is occurring in far too many workplaces across America. But, remember that simply knowing that an employer is engaging in illegal activity is only part of the battle. Once you have your suspicions of potential law-breaking, you have to decide if you are going to pursue any actions that will allow you to vindicate your rights—internally (at your workplace) or externally (through an outside agency or attorney). It is important that you document your case, maintain evidence, and prepare a list of witnesses, who can corroborate your version of events. Back to race and color discrimination…

Title VII of the Civil Rights Act states that:

-- Employers cannot permit race bias to affect work assignments, performance measurements, pay, training, mentoring or networking, discipline, or any other term, condition, or privilege of employment;

-- Work assignments must be distributed in a nondiscriminatory manner. This means that race cannot be a factor in determining the amount of work a person receives, or in determining who gets the more, or less, desirable assignments;

-- Performance evaluations frequently serve as the basis for numerous other employment decisions, such as pay, promotions, and terminations. They should be unaffected by race bias;

-- Training is important for employees to become proficient in their jobs and to prepare for advancement. This includes both formal training and informal training through feedback from supervisors. As with other aspects of the employment relationship, race cannot be a factor in who receives training and constructive feedback;

-- Informal workplace networks can be just as important to an organization as official job titles and reporting relationships. Thus, an employee’s success may depend not only on his or her job duties, but also on his or her integration into important workplace networks. Employers cannot allow racial bias to affect an employee’s ability to become part of these networks; and

-- Employees must receive compensation without regard to race. All forms of compensation are covered, such as salary, overtime pay, bonuses, stock options, expense accounts, commissions, life insurance, vacation and holiday pay, and benefits.

ISSUES IN THE WORKPLACE: COLOR-BASED ATTACKS STILL OCCUR

Yes, I am beating the Don Imus horse to death! But, there is one more thing I have to say about the issue. We all focus on race-based discrimination, but there is also color based discrimination and prejudice. Don Imus talked about specific Black women in a vile and vicious way. And, if you look at the women on the basketball team, the color issue is very obvious to see.

I’ve heard that Don Imus one laughed, when one of his cronies said that Serena and Venus Williams should be in National Geographic. Again, look at the color issue. These darker Black women were mocked as reminiscent of some sort of jungle creatures. That’s what the fool meant! The comments made about the Rutgers basketball team were said with the same sentiment!

Don Imus and his crew didn’t attack girls that looked like Alicia Keyes. No, Don Imus and his cronies attacked specific Black women of specific complexions. They didn't attack Black celebrities that are considered to be acceptable and pretty and/or beautiful according to White standards!

Color was under attack. Color was what was ugly. Color was used by the code word “nappy-headed!” Color was used by the code word “Jiggaboo.” Color is what made these girls look “exactly like the Toronto Raptors.” This was a race and color based attack through and through! Is it any wonder that little Black girls still like to play with White dolls? Even the children get it!

Color is still a major issue in the workplace. At my job, EVERY Black woman that was ever told that she had “a bad attitude” or that she was “angry” or “defensive” or “snooty” or “moody,” etc. was a brown-skin or dark-skin woman—without exception. Every race-based issue at my job involved a White person (always a White woman) and a Black woman with “distinctly” African American features and color.

And, in every case, the prevailing White mentality was to side with the White person making the complaint. It didn’t matter that examples of the alleged negative behaviors of the Black women often couldn’t be provided or that, when they were, you never heard about the “White half” of the conversations. The White women always left out what they said and how they said it.

People need to think about something…sometimes you get a rude response from a person because you’ve been rude yourself. The person isn’t just being “angry” for the sake of being angry. If you are being demeaning, disrespectful, sarcastic, bullying, rude, etc., then you may receive an in-kind response. Some people will give back the energy they receive, regardless of color.

But, at my job, the onus for any work-related issues always fell on the darker Black women. The White women were always victims, not the instigators that the White women I WORKED WITH often were. My workplace tolerated racial intolerance, discrimination, etc. And, this mindset was manifested in the behaviors and actions of some staff. They had a license to kill or to act like they owned certain people and they ran with it!

Black women at my former company were subjected to Whites making remarks about our complexions, asking us offensive questions about our hair, and making wild accusations about our behavior—accusations that were easily attributable to their overactive and racist imaginations.

That’s the way it is in some workplaces. Race can be an issue. But, color can be another issue that we often overlook. In my case, I worked with a racist VP that was perfectly fine working with a light-skinned Black coworker and her light-skinned Black secretary, but she hated me—only after seeing me in person (She worked in another state.) A senior executive at the company told his secretary that her problem with me was “this.” When he said “this,” he ran his hand across his cheek to reference my skin tone.

The level of obvious Blackness can be a catalyst that sparks an outright or closet racist to engage in discriminatory or harassing behavior. This is just another issue for Blacks to contend with in the workplace—and in life, as Don Imus showed us all!

If you are dealing with race-based issues in the workplace, don’t forget to examine color as a potential issue in your case. If you believe color is an issue, it should be argued in your internal or external complaint.