Blacks Hating on Blacks
I walked into a room to hear a Black coworker telling another Black coworker, “I don’t know Barack [Obama] from Jack. Bill [Clinton] is Black enough for me. I’m voting for Hillary [Clinton] because that’s like voting for Bill. That’s my girl! I don’t even want to hear what Barack has to say.” She said that she couldn’t stand when Blacks acted like they were your “brotha” or “sista,” when “I don’t know them.” Yet, she couldn’t identify a time when Sen. Obama behaved that way.
She then went into a workplace campaign about the joys of Hillary Clinton becoming President. Not a single issue was raised. The point was that “Bill is Black enough,” “blacker than Sen. Obama,” and “good enough for me.”
This worker was making the point that she didn’t know anything about Sen. Obama, so it was fascinating that she was choosing to go out of her way NOT TO HEAR HIM and that she was going out of her way trying to convince other workers to side with her choice of a White candidate.
This worker got me thinking about something many Blacks often talk about in private—how some of us love to be against other Black people, even when our only defense is “just because.”
Although Whites are often pointed out on this blog about workplace racism and discrimination, we have to deal with some harsh realities. One of those realities is that some Black people like to make life difficult for other Black people in the workplace. Some Black people use their own race-based stereotypes about Blacks to determine how they will judge and treat other Black workers.
Black people can make each other miserable at work by being the proverbial crabs in a barrel. I can’t believe some of things I’ve seen Black workers do to each other over the years. For instance, evidence of Blacks hating on each other and making each other miserable includes:
--Having a preference for reporting to a White manager because they can so-call “do more for you” and are “just better,” which results in some of us being resentful for being “stuck” with a Black manager;
--Engaging in a work slow-down, when given an assignment by a Black supervisor/manager;
--Intentionally holding on to an assignment in order to cause work delays for a Black supervisor/manager and out of a sense that you have to be “begged,” which makes you feel important;
--Intentionally turning in sloppy work to a Black supervisor/manager or coworker;
--Pretending not to know how to do something or how a process works, when asked about it by Black coworkers;
--Accusing Black coworkers of being “fake,” a “wanna-be,” etc. because they have been deemed not to be “ghetto” or “real” enough and making these statements to Black AND White coworkers;
--Knowingly spreading false gossip about Black coworkers to White coworkers or actually telling their personal business to White coworkers.
--Being complicit in targeting a Black coworker for mistreatment after they’ve complained of abuse;
--Accepting money and/or a promotion or some other reward for false testimony against a Black coworker;
--Lying to investigators about what happened to a Black coworker (e.g., saying you don’t know anything), not out of fear for your job, but because you don’t “owe them anything;”
--Intentionally making false statements about a Black coworker, who has complained of race-based discrimination, harassment or retaliation;
--Openly finding humor or getting pleasure out of a Black person being targeted by management; and
--Saying there is no racism in the workplace, just because a Black person has complained about it and not because it is true;
These are just examples. I’m sure some readers could greatly expand on this list.
The sad truth is many of us still have a plantation mentality. Instead of focusing on our condition, we focus on what’s petty and we may treat each other in an intentionally harmful manner. We set up false competitions with each other. We envy each other because of success or reward. We seek to bring someone down, who we think believes they are superior to us (e.g., they “talk White,” went to a “good school,” etc.). We find reasons or don’t need reasons to be uncooperative. We feel a loyalty to Whites because we’re grateful they “let us” have a job. We’ve seen friends and family treat each other this way and treat other Blacks this way. We simply may not know any better. There are all sorts of reasons for Blacks hating on each other and walking around with a “that ni**er ain’t shit!” attitude about another Black person.
We need to stop being so quick to tear each other down. We need some self-reflection…a moment to stop and ask why we engage in this behavior. We need to strive to change what is internally wrong with how we think about and treat other Black people. We need to treat each other with the same respect we demand from Whites in the workplace.
It’s fine not to deal with someone and develop a reasonable rationale for why you don’t care for them. But, with Blacks, from my experience, you have people sniping and carrying on with people they don’t know enough not to like.
“That b*tch think she cute.”
“That motherf*cka thinks he’s so smart.”
“He ain’t gonna tell me what to do.”
“She thinks she can boss me around.”
“She don’t mean sh*t to me.”
I’ve heard it all before and more than once. Just trying to be difficult and trying to find a way to cause some grief. Many of us don’t mind being crabs in the barrel.
Going back to politics, some people raise legitimate issues with Sen. Obama and some just seem to be repeating what they’re hearing White people say. They can’t go into any deep discussion about their criticisms, at least, not more than what they’ve heard. Of course, there are questions about the Senator. And, there should be.
But, I hear Sen. Obama being torn down by many Blacks on a regular basis. “He ain’t this.” And, “He ain’t that.” And, “He thinks he’s all this.” And, “He’s not saying he’s that.” And, “His mother is White.” And, “He’s not really Black.” It goes on and on.
Anyone who thinks Sen. Obama can count on Black people to vote for him solely based on race, doesn’t know enough Black people. I don’t care if all Black people had their concerns or fears resolved. They would STILL find a reason not to support this man because, just like in the workplace, there are Black people who are going to be difficult with Sen. Obama…just because. Some of us seem to be hard-wired that way!
When it comes to the workplace, we will never free ourselves from discrimination and other illegal behavior, when we choose to focus on needlessly destroying and being difficult with the Black people we work with. This reinforces our targeting by those in the workplace, who would choose to treat us in a disparate and unequal fashion.
We can’t fight the real battles that need our intention, if we simply desire to focus on petty squabbles of our own making. Let’s all look inside ourselves this year and identify how we may be contributing to any issues in the workplace and how we can make things better. And, let’s strive to stop being difficult with each other for reasons that are without merit!
She then went into a workplace campaign about the joys of Hillary Clinton becoming President. Not a single issue was raised. The point was that “Bill is Black enough,” “blacker than Sen. Obama,” and “good enough for me.”
This worker was making the point that she didn’t know anything about Sen. Obama, so it was fascinating that she was choosing to go out of her way NOT TO HEAR HIM and that she was going out of her way trying to convince other workers to side with her choice of a White candidate.
This worker got me thinking about something many Blacks often talk about in private—how some of us love to be against other Black people, even when our only defense is “just because.”
Although Whites are often pointed out on this blog about workplace racism and discrimination, we have to deal with some harsh realities. One of those realities is that some Black people like to make life difficult for other Black people in the workplace. Some Black people use their own race-based stereotypes about Blacks to determine how they will judge and treat other Black workers.
Black people can make each other miserable at work by being the proverbial crabs in a barrel. I can’t believe some of things I’ve seen Black workers do to each other over the years. For instance, evidence of Blacks hating on each other and making each other miserable includes:
--Having a preference for reporting to a White manager because they can so-call “do more for you” and are “just better,” which results in some of us being resentful for being “stuck” with a Black manager;
--Engaging in a work slow-down, when given an assignment by a Black supervisor/manager;
--Intentionally holding on to an assignment in order to cause work delays for a Black supervisor/manager and out of a sense that you have to be “begged,” which makes you feel important;
--Intentionally turning in sloppy work to a Black supervisor/manager or coworker;
--Pretending not to know how to do something or how a process works, when asked about it by Black coworkers;
--Accusing Black coworkers of being “fake,” a “wanna-be,” etc. because they have been deemed not to be “ghetto” or “real” enough and making these statements to Black AND White coworkers;
--Knowingly spreading false gossip about Black coworkers to White coworkers or actually telling their personal business to White coworkers.
--Being complicit in targeting a Black coworker for mistreatment after they’ve complained of abuse;
--Accepting money and/or a promotion or some other reward for false testimony against a Black coworker;
--Lying to investigators about what happened to a Black coworker (e.g., saying you don’t know anything), not out of fear for your job, but because you don’t “owe them anything;”
--Intentionally making false statements about a Black coworker, who has complained of race-based discrimination, harassment or retaliation;
--Openly finding humor or getting pleasure out of a Black person being targeted by management; and
--Saying there is no racism in the workplace, just because a Black person has complained about it and not because it is true;
These are just examples. I’m sure some readers could greatly expand on this list.
The sad truth is many of us still have a plantation mentality. Instead of focusing on our condition, we focus on what’s petty and we may treat each other in an intentionally harmful manner. We set up false competitions with each other. We envy each other because of success or reward. We seek to bring someone down, who we think believes they are superior to us (e.g., they “talk White,” went to a “good school,” etc.). We find reasons or don’t need reasons to be uncooperative. We feel a loyalty to Whites because we’re grateful they “let us” have a job. We’ve seen friends and family treat each other this way and treat other Blacks this way. We simply may not know any better. There are all sorts of reasons for Blacks hating on each other and walking around with a “that ni**er ain’t shit!” attitude about another Black person.
We need to stop being so quick to tear each other down. We need some self-reflection…a moment to stop and ask why we engage in this behavior. We need to strive to change what is internally wrong with how we think about and treat other Black people. We need to treat each other with the same respect we demand from Whites in the workplace.
It’s fine not to deal with someone and develop a reasonable rationale for why you don’t care for them. But, with Blacks, from my experience, you have people sniping and carrying on with people they don’t know enough not to like.
“That b*tch think she cute.”
“That motherf*cka thinks he’s so smart.”
“He ain’t gonna tell me what to do.”
“She thinks she can boss me around.”
“She don’t mean sh*t to me.”
I’ve heard it all before and more than once. Just trying to be difficult and trying to find a way to cause some grief. Many of us don’t mind being crabs in the barrel.
Going back to politics, some people raise legitimate issues with Sen. Obama and some just seem to be repeating what they’re hearing White people say. They can’t go into any deep discussion about their criticisms, at least, not more than what they’ve heard. Of course, there are questions about the Senator. And, there should be.
But, I hear Sen. Obama being torn down by many Blacks on a regular basis. “He ain’t this.” And, “He ain’t that.” And, “He thinks he’s all this.” And, “He’s not saying he’s that.” And, “His mother is White.” And, “He’s not really Black.” It goes on and on.
Anyone who thinks Sen. Obama can count on Black people to vote for him solely based on race, doesn’t know enough Black people. I don’t care if all Black people had their concerns or fears resolved. They would STILL find a reason not to support this man because, just like in the workplace, there are Black people who are going to be difficult with Sen. Obama…just because. Some of us seem to be hard-wired that way!
When it comes to the workplace, we will never free ourselves from discrimination and other illegal behavior, when we choose to focus on needlessly destroying and being difficult with the Black people we work with. This reinforces our targeting by those in the workplace, who would choose to treat us in a disparate and unequal fashion.
We can’t fight the real battles that need our intention, if we simply desire to focus on petty squabbles of our own making. Let’s all look inside ourselves this year and identify how we may be contributing to any issues in the workplace and how we can make things better. And, let’s strive to stop being difficult with each other for reasons that are without merit!
Labels: same race discrimination, stereotypes
posted by S. Mary Wills at 9:12 AM
5 Comments:
Many of us are incapable of recognizing the “slave mentality” if it jumped up and slapped us in the face. We stand blind incapable of realizing that we’ve been manipulated far too long and have played a role in the destruction of our brothers and sisters. Our meager sites have held us captive to the small “ME” rather than the big “WE.” The bottom line is that we need to first acknowledge the slave mentality exists and then work on some corrective action. If we stay in ignorance, we will inadvertently condemn our son(s) or daughter(s) as the next target because we are investing in their education. Quite adequately, our investment will bear the fruit of their success and since they must garner that success in most cases in a majority white education they will not be thought of as being black enough. Wake up then make a commitment to change, it starts with you!
I have a different take on why some African-Americans may not vote for Barak Obama. I think it is because he is of African descent and a citizen of the United States of America. Many African-Americans have no attachment to Africa and feel no brotherhood or sisterhood for the Motherland of our race.
Also, African-American women have not had the greatest track record with men in general. African-American men tend to make babies and enjoy being a baby's daddy to more than one woman in the same community. This is a rational mistrust of the male who more often than not does what is best for himself at the expense of others.
In addition to the historic stigma of the slave-trade is the belief that the 'White Man' will take care of what the 'Black Man' appears not to want to. It is a travesty that Bill Clinton gets the dubious distinction of being the 'first black president' without having the stigma of betrayal, infidelity, and adultery. The time has come to knock off the hat -- that the not so superfly Bill Clinton has been given to wear representative of sexual irresponsibility. African-American men who identify with this behavior and pump up the volume is atrocious. African-American women should regard Hillary with skepticism for not having 'kicked him to the curb.'
It is not for the African-American male to congratulate Bill for being a dog any more than African-American women should sympathize with Hillary because she gives the appearance of the wronged wife. For my money, if...if...IF...she had kicked Billy out...she would have my respect today! I am not advocating divorce but had she shown backbone in that troubling situation with Lewinsky, I could believe she would fight for me and my children's futures. However, all I really feel is fear that the woman feels entitled and wants to show she is a better man than her husband, even if she isn't.
African-American women have settled for the doggishness of men so long that when a good one comes along he is too good to be true. African-American men have been pitted against each other for what is on and under the table. Barak and his wife Michelle remind us of what normal looks like and way too many of us have Clintonesque relationships that, in the end, is a little bit of everything and alot of nothing.
We would do better to consider too that Hillary wrote a book - It Takes a Village - she has as much nerve as Laura Ingram who wrote - Power to the People. Look deeply at people who take what is not theirs but appropriate anyway.
Barak Obama is Black. A Harvard graduate. A Senator. A husband. A father. An author. A constitutionalist. A listener. He is the image of what any African-American woman would want in a husband and this is not close to the total man he is to his wife and his friends. He is taking the first step to be the candidate of inclusion....do we dare to hope? YWC. Do we dare to dream? We had better reach up and keep looking up because there is one promise that history teaches us: this too shall pass. Read that to suit yourself but understand once the friendship train leaves the station you won't be able to get on board until it returns - and who knows when that will be....
I'm new to feedblitz and I'm very impressed with the articles that I've been reading about today's issues. I do agree with everything that was said on this article because I can relate to it. We do need to get rid of the "slave mentality" and there should be more uplifting of one another in the Black Community.
My apologies....Mr. Barack Obama
Onusomos...well said!
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