Tips for Dealing with "Piling On"
These tips are linked to the last post on piling on a.k.a. being ganged up on at work as a method of punishing you, creating a hostile work environment, and/or running you out of a job.
Tip #1: Document everything. The point to piling on is to place an extreme amount of pressure on an individual in the hopes of crushing that person. In the workplace, the goals of piling on could include: getting someone to withdraw a complaint, pressuring someone to remain silent, forcing an employee to resign, setting up an employee for personnel actions (e.g., demotion, suspension, etc.), and/or laying the groundwork to terminate an employee by creating numerous employees with so-called legitimate complaints about a target. Only by documenting everything can you keep track of all the players.
Tip #2: You should create a log. The log should capture information including: the names of everyone involved in the piling on, the role each person played in the piling on, if the person was truly involved in the incident or if they forced their way on board in order to target you (e.g. an employee you normally have nothing to do with is suddenly joining complaints made against you based on a sudden interaction in the workplace that may have been manufactured by the employer), the specific language, threats, etc. made by the person(s) piling on—listed for each incident, and your response to any incidents you’ve logged (e.g., a memo to a supervisor, etc.)
Tip #3: Get every accusation in writing. There are some people who are willing to join in the efforts to target a coworker, but they don’t want to leave any evidence that they’ve decided to take part in illegal activities at work. They’re all for trying to gain points with a supervisor or manager by piling on, but they are fearful of taking heat about it. So, it’s up to you to push them all the way. If they want to pile on, make them own it!!! If people are piling on and making false accusations against you, get it in writing. If the person has made verbal complaints about you (and you are sure they are going to relay those complaints, possibly in writing, to someone in authority), get their comments in writing. After you are verbally assaulted with manufactured complaints, send the person an email listing EVERYTHING they said. Emphasize whatever it is they emphasized. And then…
Tip #4: Shoot holes in every false allegation made against you! Anytime you are under attack, you cannot afford to let lies stand. You must respond in a professional manner to any false accusation or you are implying that the false accusation is based in reality. You don’t have to resort to name-calling or accuse someone of collusion. Just state what was said (or written) to you and/or about you and tear the accusations to shreds. Show no mercy as you expose any outright lies or manipulations about your work ethic, the quality of your work, your professionalism, your personality, and/or any other complaints. Mention any evidence you have, such as written instructions and mention any witnesses, such as another coworker working on the same project. This will make the liar nervous and will put them in a position where they must decide if they will 1) stick to the lie despite evidence and witnesses or 2) try to coerce a witness to join the lie (it’s always dangerous to add more people to a web of lies) or 3) back off of false allegations by saying there’s been some “miscommunication” or “misunderstanding.”
Tip #5: Send an email or memo to HR. By doing so, there will be a record that you have notified your employer of potentially illegal abuse (e.g., harassment/hostile work environment or retaliation). Your employer would love to have the argument available that you never complained of mistreatment and, therefore, they could do nothing to stop abuse from happening again. They will blame the victim and say the onus was on you to notify them of potential violations of Federal statutes.
Tip #6: Keep copies of all your documentation at home. You never know when someone will pillage through your office and destroy your evidence. A former employer sent staff to rummage through my office and the office of a coworker, who’d filed a complaint with the Office of Human Rights. Our chairs would be moved, items on our desk were not as we left them, I could tell someone had gone through my drawers, my screensaver would be running, when I’d turned my computer off at night, etc. Always maintain a healthy dose of paranoia. Protect your documentation!
Tip #7: Seek legal counsel or contact an investigatory agency, such as EEOC. Remember that discrimination, harassment, and retaliation are illegal! If you are being subjected to a barrage of attacks at work, you may want to consider external forms of relief.
Tip #8: Look at other employment opportunities. Sometimes these hell jobs represent an opportunity to look for other career avenues and places of employment. Yes, one job could be as bad as the next, but you never know. Maybe you’d even like to take classes. Consider all of your options and place your mental, emotional, financial, and spiritual well-being ahead of a job that could literally kill you.
Tip #1: Document everything. The point to piling on is to place an extreme amount of pressure on an individual in the hopes of crushing that person. In the workplace, the goals of piling on could include: getting someone to withdraw a complaint, pressuring someone to remain silent, forcing an employee to resign, setting up an employee for personnel actions (e.g., demotion, suspension, etc.), and/or laying the groundwork to terminate an employee by creating numerous employees with so-called legitimate complaints about a target. Only by documenting everything can you keep track of all the players.
Tip #2: You should create a log. The log should capture information including: the names of everyone involved in the piling on, the role each person played in the piling on, if the person was truly involved in the incident or if they forced their way on board in order to target you (e.g. an employee you normally have nothing to do with is suddenly joining complaints made against you based on a sudden interaction in the workplace that may have been manufactured by the employer), the specific language, threats, etc. made by the person(s) piling on—listed for each incident, and your response to any incidents you’ve logged (e.g., a memo to a supervisor, etc.)
Tip #3: Get every accusation in writing. There are some people who are willing to join in the efforts to target a coworker, but they don’t want to leave any evidence that they’ve decided to take part in illegal activities at work. They’re all for trying to gain points with a supervisor or manager by piling on, but they are fearful of taking heat about it. So, it’s up to you to push them all the way. If they want to pile on, make them own it!!! If people are piling on and making false accusations against you, get it in writing. If the person has made verbal complaints about you (and you are sure they are going to relay those complaints, possibly in writing, to someone in authority), get their comments in writing. After you are verbally assaulted with manufactured complaints, send the person an email listing EVERYTHING they said. Emphasize whatever it is they emphasized. And then…
Tip #4: Shoot holes in every false allegation made against you! Anytime you are under attack, you cannot afford to let lies stand. You must respond in a professional manner to any false accusation or you are implying that the false accusation is based in reality. You don’t have to resort to name-calling or accuse someone of collusion. Just state what was said (or written) to you and/or about you and tear the accusations to shreds. Show no mercy as you expose any outright lies or manipulations about your work ethic, the quality of your work, your professionalism, your personality, and/or any other complaints. Mention any evidence you have, such as written instructions and mention any witnesses, such as another coworker working on the same project. This will make the liar nervous and will put them in a position where they must decide if they will 1) stick to the lie despite evidence and witnesses or 2) try to coerce a witness to join the lie (it’s always dangerous to add more people to a web of lies) or 3) back off of false allegations by saying there’s been some “miscommunication” or “misunderstanding.”
Tip #5: Send an email or memo to HR. By doing so, there will be a record that you have notified your employer of potentially illegal abuse (e.g., harassment/hostile work environment or retaliation). Your employer would love to have the argument available that you never complained of mistreatment and, therefore, they could do nothing to stop abuse from happening again. They will blame the victim and say the onus was on you to notify them of potential violations of Federal statutes.
Tip #6: Keep copies of all your documentation at home. You never know when someone will pillage through your office and destroy your evidence. A former employer sent staff to rummage through my office and the office of a coworker, who’d filed a complaint with the Office of Human Rights. Our chairs would be moved, items on our desk were not as we left them, I could tell someone had gone through my drawers, my screensaver would be running, when I’d turned my computer off at night, etc. Always maintain a healthy dose of paranoia. Protect your documentation!
Tip #7: Seek legal counsel or contact an investigatory agency, such as EEOC. Remember that discrimination, harassment, and retaliation are illegal! If you are being subjected to a barrage of attacks at work, you may want to consider external forms of relief.
Tip #8: Look at other employment opportunities. Sometimes these hell jobs represent an opportunity to look for other career avenues and places of employment. Yes, one job could be as bad as the next, but you never know. Maybe you’d even like to take classes. Consider all of your options and place your mental, emotional, financial, and spiritual well-being ahead of a job that could literally kill you.
Labels: employment action, false allegations, harassment, hostile work environment, tips and strategies
posted by S. Mary Wills at 5:32 AM
3 Comments:
Do you have tips, or is there a past posting that addresses what to look out for to NOT get ourselves into these hostile environments? Are there signs during an interview? Do you ask to meet your coworkers, and supervisors? Do you go by your gut or is there some subtle signs to look out for? For example I took a job that seemed like a wonderful opportunity....I never got to meet with the person who was my "other" supervisor. I later found out that I was working with substance abuse counselors who were abusers or still abusing. First meeting the supervisor mocked a "latino man". Any information would be good. Thanks
"Are there signs during an interview?"
During a recent interview, I had an interviewer question why I attended an HBCU saying in a smug voice "Your a smart woman, why did you go there?" All the while, the other panel members looked completely horrified at his question.
The interviewer also asked several illegal questions (i.e., marital status, etc). By the way, the interviewer was the department head. Had I accepted the position, I would have worked directly with him. One of the panel members actually apologized to me for his behavior and line of questioning after the interview.
That was the only sign I needed to run for the hills.
I must say, people who interviewed me for the jobs were never the people who gave me problems, or they wouldn’t have given me the job in the first place. It was other people, especially those who did not have a say in my hiring that made my working life a hell.
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